Bret Bielema has procreated in the off-season.
Ok, Jen actually had a baby. Yours truly thinks the kid is a spitting image of Razorback linebacker, Dre Greenlaw…
but this is a judgement free rant.
Assuming it is Bret’s spawn, do you think a baby with a 19 1/2 inch neck will ever get a date?! She will if momma teaches her the art of picking up men with large…buyouts.
The Hogs are stuck with Bret at least another year, as it would cost them $12 large waffles to buy Bret out. Since he’s coaching my Hogs for now, we might as well find a way he can win.
TCU’s field general, Kenny Hill, went all throat slashing reaper last year in this game, and that penalty ultimately cost the Frogs the game as Arkansas got the ball in great field position with a chance to score late in regulation and send the game to overtime.
What a role model. You’re the head QB, and clearly the most important non-bovine creature in all of Fort Worth, and you go all Blood v. Crips on us?! But don’t fret, he couldn’t cut it at Texas A&M and he led the Frogs to a 6-7 finish. He’s a winner. Clearly.
On the opposing side of the ball, Arkansas has a bonafide monster. His name is Sosa Agim.
This guy is a freak show. One man can’t stop him. That’s why he gets double-teamed more than Smokes at a gay cigar bar.
DaKidd is going on the record right now and saying Sosa Agim will be a Top 10 NFL draft pick after next football season. He’s already the best D-lineman in the country – and no one has heard of him. That all changes Saturday afternoon on CBS.
On the other side line, we have Gary penis patter. Is it just me, or does he look like a guy who eats his own boogers?
And I’ll bet he likes them perfectly round and fresh. But he’s is one of the top 15 highest paid coaches is in all of college football, and has turned TCU into a program of relevance.
His quarterback, Throat Slasher, is an A&M reject who is quicker than Smokes on top of one of those cigar lounge boys.
Cousin Emmett was painting a bathroom wall up in Fayetteville and overheard Razorback fans saying the Hogs had no chance.
No chance?! These same teams played last year in Cattleville, and the Hogs dominated the Frogs for 3 1/2 quarters before ultimately winning in double overtime as 10 point dogs.
DaKidd cashed in big in Vegas on that one, and ended the night a set of Siamese twins…
Talk about double overtime…but it got messy. Afterwards, I didn’t know which Siamese twin was texting me. They have the same hands for god sakes.👐🏼
On the field, TCU has the better coach. Arkansas has home field. Athletes are about the same caliber. I like Austin Allen as a 2nd year starter to make a couple more plays than Throat Slasher. Hogs 31 Frogs 24.